When you’re miserable, you have a tendency to speak negatively and focus only on bad things which makes you more miserable. Here are a few ways to get out of your rut and talk like a happy person. Fake it ‘til you make it!

If you’re invited to a party, deep down inside you probably would rather make a date with your sweatpants and a Modern Family marathon, but instead of rolling your eyes and trying to find an excuse as to why you can’t go, say, “I’m looking forward to it!” Stay optimistic. Who knows? You may meet someone who will get you off the couch and sweep you off your feet. Studies even show that you’re happier the week leading up to you taking off on vacation, so if you plan to go to a party on Friday night, dancing with the girls on Saturday or brunch with friends on Sunday, it can also brighten your mood.

We’ve all heard the phrase, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again” and that’s what you should be telling yourself. If you give a big sales pitch to a potential client and they go with something your coworker dreamed up, tell yourself, “I’ll give it another try.” Even if you fall flat on your face, at least you’re still moving forward. I’ve been trying to lose some weight and it’s really hard for me to do it in wintertime because I can’t exercise outside like I can in the spring, summer and fall, so right now I have to rely on my eating habits. I had a horrible week a couple of weeks ago and gained three pounds back, but I told myself, “I’m not going to give up. I’m going to do better and give it another shot.” Last week, I lost those three pounds I gained and another pound on top of that, so focus on giving it another try.

My friends and I have a saying we use when things don’t seem to be going our way. We say, “Have an attitude of gratitude” so say “thank you” more often. Studies have shown that people who are grateful for things tend to be happier in general and have a better overall attitude. Even if you got out of the house late, left your coffee mug on top of your car and lost it somewhere between home and the day care, think of it this way: You woke up in a warm safe house, with a car to drive to the job you have and are blessed with healthy, happy children you can love and spoil all you want. How’s that for turning things around?

Just saying these things one time likely won’t change your attitude, so you have to say them over and over again, but try it for a month and see what happens!